Narcissist Lying: Signs, Types, And Coping Tips

The narcissist is the king in lying. It’s all part of their game, really. They use lies to make themselves seem like an innocent victim or a perfect person that nobody could ever measure up to. The truth is that they are always lying. They lie about everything; their achievements, their appearance, and even who they are in general.

Who Is A Narcissist?

A narcissist is someone who has an overinflated sense of self-importance and is excessively preoccupied with themselves. This condition usually stems from a deep-rooted issue with self-esteem, which is caused by early life experiences where the individual was told they were special, gifted, or more superior than others. The narcissist generally feels entitled to certain privileges and can be highly manipulative of other people for their own gain.

Adult narcissists normally have very few if any real relationships outside of themselves, making everyday interactions about them in some way. It is common for a person with a narcissistic personality disorder to exaggerate their achievements, believing that they are more important/valuable/better than everyone else. Many narcissists come across as confident individuals – this is because they will mask their own insecurity behind an overinflated ego. They are unable to handle criticism well and may resort to projection, where they will blame others for their own mistakes.

Narcissists often reinvent past events and alter the truth in order to paint themselves in a positive light, even if this means disregarding the feelings of loved ones and twisting these events into something that feels ‘right’ for them. This is known as gaslighting. Narcissist distances themselves from any negativity or confrontation so they can avoid feeling bad about themselves – they may also do this when someone confronts them over their behavior.

How To Identify A Narcissist Lying?

There are a few different types of lying that narcissists tell, but all have the same goal in mind – to make themselves look good. The most common type of lie is known as the ‘grandiose lie’. This is a blatant exaggeration of the truth in order to make the narcissist look more impressive or important. A common example of this would be a person who tells others they are wealthy when they are actually struggling financially.

Another common type of lie is known as the ‘small lie’. This is a minor exaggeration of the truth, often told in order to get out of trouble or to avoid having to deal with difficult emotions. For example, a person might say they are not feeling well when they actually do feel ill, in order to get out of having to go to work.

Lies told in order to impress others are known as ‘impression management’ and often fall under this category. Narcissists will often portray themselves as being more important than they actually are, hoping that other people will form a higher opinion of them if they do so.

Two Types Of Narcissist Lying: Self-Aggrandizement & Manipulation

The narcissist does not see those around them as people but as objects to serve their own needs. They tell lies for many reasons – the ultimate goal is always control and dominance over others, either achieving this through what they say or by withholding information that would upset them (the silent treatment). The following lists the different types of lying a person with a narcissistic personality disorder may partake in.

Self-Aggrandizement

The narcissist uses flattery to manipulate other people into thinking they are special. They will constantly be lying about their achievements both past and present in order to bolster their own ego or to make themselves seem more attractive. They often tell ‘big fish’ stories that portray them in a good light, distorting the truth beyond all recognition – this can include false accounts of their past experiences, what they feel/think about certain situations, and how much they care for others (even if sometimes they do not actually like them). Narcissists like to appear powerful and successful in the eyes of other people (or at least give off this impression), even if deep down inside there is a part of them that feels worthless and empty.

Manipulation

Narcissists lie to get their own way by withholding information or deliberately misleading people so they can upset them. This type of lying is also done for attention, which means the narcissist has learned how to work with other people’s emotions, many times controlling what they say and do. They often respond to confrontation with anger and threats, resorting to verbal outbursts as a form of defense even when it is not necessary. When they feel humiliated or criticized by others this will be their main focus rather than any wrongdoing on their part, meaning that they will go on the attack rather than staying calm and letting things slide (they believe it is up to them to defend themselves).

Narcissistic Personality Disorder  (NPD) is not easy to live with because it impacts everyone they come into contact with, including family members, friends, and partners. They lack empathy which makes them indifferent to other people’s needs or how they feel. This can be extremely difficult for those closest to them since their own feelings are dismissed by the narcissist – this is often used as a weapon against the victim (saying things like “I’m tired of your problems”).

What Can You Expect From A Partner With NPD?

The most important thing you need to know about living with someone who has a narcissistic personality disorder is that this person will never change. Since it is mental health they cannot treat it any more than you can treat your physical health (such as a broken leg) and expect it to get better. They may agree to go see a therapist but this is not something they want to do, it’s just another way for them to gain control over someone else. The only reason they will go into counseling is that they hope that you will come out and then they can keep using you until the therapy has finished.

What You Can Do?

Because narcissistic personality disorder is so hard to live with you need to ask yourself if this relationship is really worth all of the trouble or if ending things once and for all would be the best thing for both of you. It does not matter how much love has been shared between two people – anyone who disregards their partner’s feelings and does not care about their own behavior is not worth having around. You deserve to be treated with love, affection, and respect by the person you care for – if this is something they are unable to provide with then there is no point in trying to change them or stay together.

Different Types Of Lying And How To Spot Them?

1. Denial – When someone denies they did something or when they say “I don’t know.”

2. Minimization – When someone says, “It’s no big deal,” when they know that it is a big deal

3. Justification – When a person tries to justify their bad behavior by blaming someone or something else for it

4. Rationalization – When a person makes excuses for their behavior without being honest about the true reasons behind it

5. Projection – Narcissists often accuse other people of doing the same things they themselves have done.

6. Gaslighting – This is when a person tries to convince you that what you know happened didn’t actually happen.

How To Deal With Narcissist Lying In Your Life?

1. Don’t trust them no matter how much proof you have that they’re telling the truth.

2. Keep your own journal to remember details about conversations and events.

3. Trust your gut even if you can’t explain why something doesn’t feel right.

4. Stay calm when they try to get you mad so they don’t have the upper hand on you emotionally.

5. If it’s an immediate problem, confront them with the proof you have of their lying behavior.

6. If it’s a long-term pattern, stay away from him/her as much as possible.

How To Heal From Being Lied To By A Narcissistic Person?

1. Get rid of anything that reminds you of the person or that they gave you.

2. Don’t talk about them or to them, even if they tell you what you want to know.

3. Don’t trust the information that comes from them no matter how much proof you have of their lies.

4. Remember that it isn’t your shame – the shame belongs entirely to the person who lied to you.

5. Use the phrase, “If what you’re saying is true…” when you have to deal with them in an uncertain situation.

6. Don’t forget that the person who lies doesn’t deserve your sympathy or empathy.

How Can You Protect Yourself From Being Lied To?

1. Trust your instincts and don’t be afraid to end a relationship if you feel something is wrong.

2. Never believe an apology from them – narcissists only apologize when they think it will benefit them in some way and they do not regret their actions at all.

3. If something doesn’t ring true, it isn’t true no matter how much proof they give you to support their claim

4. Remember that a narcissist’s desire to control others is more important than anything else – even the truth.

5. Never share personal information with them or anything you wish to keep from them even if they act like they want to hear it or use it against you later.

6. Don’t give them any more chances than is necessary – narcissists never change, no matter how many chances you give them.

7. End all contact with the person who lies to you because it can lead to severe depression and PTSD if you don’t.

8. If you can, stay away from anyone that they have influence over to protect yourself from their lies.

Conclusion

Narcissists lie to themselves and others, but their lies are often transparent. They may feel like they’re more competent than the average person or that people don’t understand them. This is an example of how narcissism can manifest as self-deception in order to maintain a sense of superiority. Narcissistic individuals also tend to be chronically unhappy because it becomes difficult for them to have empathy for other human beings who are suffering from problems that the narcissist has never experienced or encountered before. The disorder causes narcissistic people to think they deserve special privileges without having earned them through hard work or accomplishments. There isn’t any clear consensus about what percentage of society consists of these toxic personalities, but it’s estimated that one out of every 25 people is a narcissist. If you know a narcissist and are dealing with narcissist lying. Reach out to us. We are here to help.

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